The Lawyer’s Well-Being Brief. . .Breaking the Fear Loop
“The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.”-Michelangelo
Welcome (back) to the Lawyer’s Well-Being Brief! Each week, I share insights and practical strategies to help us cultivate well-being and thrive — both personally and professionally. Live well! Lawyer well!
This week we are looking at some tips from The Courage Habit: How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life, written by Kate Swoboda (https://www.yourcourageouslife.com/courage-habit).
Fear has a funny way of hiding its true face.
It tells us to be careful when we should be bold. It calls itself “logic” when we’re ready to leap. It whispers, we’re not ready yet — but we’ve actually been ready for a while.
In The Courage Habit, Kate Swoboda shows us that courage isn’t a trait we’re born with. It’s a pattern. A practice. A way of living.
Most importantly, it’s a habit we can build.
The Fear Loop: Why We Stay Stuck
We often think fear is the enemy, but fear is just doing its job — trying to keep us safe. The real issue is the loop we get stuck in.
Swoboda names this the Fear Loop: a cycle of avoidance, self-criticism, numbing, and perfectionism. It pretends to be safety, but really it’s a cage.
The good news? We can break free from that loop.
The Four Courage Habits
Instead of reacting to fear, we can respond with courage. Swoboda outlines four habits to create a more courageous life:
Access the Body When fear hits, our nervous system reacts. To make brave choices, we must first get grounded. This could mean deep breathing, movement, or mindfulness. Courage begins with being present.
Listen Without Attachment Fearful thoughts will always come up. The key is to listen without believing them. Thoughts aren’t orders — they’re just thoughts. Notice them. Name them. But don’t let them take control.
Reframe Limiting Stories We all carry narratives like “I’m not good enough” or “I always mess things up.” The courageous path invites us to rewrite these stories. What if your fear means you’re on the verge of growth?
Reach Out and Create Community Courage grows through connection. We need spaces to share, be seen, and feel less alone. Whether it’s a coach, a friend, or a supportive group, community fuels brave living.
Courage is a Practice, Not a Personality
We don’t need to feel fearless to act courageously. In fact, we probably won’t. Courage isn’t about getting rid of fear — it’s about choosing to act with fear at our side.
That dream we’ve been nurturing? That boundary we’ve been afraid to set? That exciting new chapter? Those are our invitations. Our cues.
They won’t stop appearing — because life always invites us to practice courage.
One Last Thought: Small Acts, Big Shifts
The Courage Habit isn’t about instant change. It’s about building small, brave actions that add up over time.
One breath. One truth. One bold yes. Keep practicing.
Because courage doesn’t begin when you feel ready. It starts when you show up anyway.
Forward Always!
